Sunday, August 21, 2011

In the Belly of the Beast

Controlled Chaos.

I did not fully understand the concept until yesterday. I confronted controlled chaos up close and a little too personal.

The Warped Tour.

It is a local collection of concerts in Saint Petersburg, Florida. Every year in Vinoy Park stages are set for the venue. Bands from across the globe are gathered to perform at the Warped Tour which showcases all these bands with multiple stages set across the park's grounds in an all day gauntlet.

I was not sure what I walked into when I purchased tickets to this event. My friend Gonzalo and my brother pushed me into going. I was forced, but they assured me that I would have an amazing time. I was still unsure.

So I tried to do some research about some of the groups that were attending this year. Most of the names I glanced over were bands I had never heard of. Some of the bands had names that seemed familiar, but I knew them by name alone. I found only three or four bands that I actually knew on the venue. Of those small list of recognizable bands, I really wanted to go see 'The Expendables' and 'Against Me'. The idea of going to this event started to churn in my head. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad. I had never been to a concert like this before. It was starting to sound actually...fun.

The day of the event, we drove together and met with our buddy Casey at the park. I made the mistake of wearing a black shirt on a wonderful, 90+ degree day. Upon exiting the car, instant sweat. Mistake number one. Luckily I had an undershirt on that I could remove. Thankfully my shirt was sleeveless which helped air things out. Still, this was a premonition of things to come. Today was going to be a hot muggy mess.

The three of us did our ritual hot-boxing before anything and went on our high, merry way. You know, when you are blitzed out of your mind, the heat doesn't bother you that much. I guess that could be good or bad depending on your perspective, but alas, we were off to have a grand time. Hopefully no one would have a heat stroke!

Gonzalo and Stephen got a map of where the best bands were playing and at what times. Each had their own agenda of who to see, but both made it clear, they wanted to reconvene at the 'Dance Gavin Dance' show. The two couldn't agree on some of the early performers, but Gonzalo insisted I go with him to the watch 'The Devil Wears Prada.' I obliged.

This band seemed to have one of the larger crowds gathering. I wasn't ready for what I was about to undertake. The scene seemed calm enough at first. Everyone was relaxing, staring at the empty stage. The band was late. The time that they were supposed to start came and went, as more people started to flock around the elevated circuit. Me and Gonzalo were just spectating all the queer attendees at this conglomeration of masses. From behind, someone grabbed my butt; it felt more like a pinch. I turned around and there were two girls standing behind us. Gonzalo didn't notice and they weren't paying us any mind, so I brushed it off. A few seconds later I was pinched in my bum again. I turned around and saw one of the girls who wasn't bad looking staring at me, giggling.

Just then there was movement in front of us. Before I could do anything about the ass grabber, the collection of people started to swarm and gather as close to the stage as possible. Me and Gonzalo were ushered in, like a powerful wave had picked us up and was edging closer to the front. There was nothing he or I could do. If we didn't move, we would likely get trampled.

The band was starting to walk onto the stage.

The crowed roared with excitement. It was a deep, foreboding sound. We were now in a tightly packed group of human body parts all group together in an uncomfortable amalgamation. That all ended once the band started playing.

It was pure chaos. Everyone all at once started to disperse, jump around, run like mad people and flair their appendages like they had to regard for themselves or anyone around them. As I was soaking all this madness up, another crazy event started to unfold; the mosh pit was starting to form. As close as everyone was, like a colony of ants, everyone moved in unison to open up a hole in the middle of the crowd. I swear to you, I could feel the atmosphere start to change inside this insanity. I started to see rocks on the ground start to shift like an episode of Dragon Ball Z. I had never seen anything like this before.

Gonzalo started to gravitate towards the mosh pit. I followed suit. I was pretty nervous about this whole ordeal...but I was high. What's the worst thing that could happen? Just as I was thinking these thoughts in my head, I looked over and noticed a girl contemplating the same thing I was; jumping into this mess. She was swinging her arms, like she was preparing to jump into a bought of double dutch, waiting for the perfect time to fly and and let the maelstrom sweep her away.

I shit you not, the second....THE SECOND this girl actually attempted to join the pit, a flying elbow came in and wrecked her life. She crumpled to the ground like a wet paper bag. Holy balls I felt bad for her...but I wasn't going to go over there and check on her. This was bedlam. It almost seemed as if people were intentionally trying to punch and kick people. Before I knew it I jumped into the mosh pit and started running.

So, if you didn't know, a mosh pit is something that starts at concerts where a bunch of strangers start to run around in a circular fashion to the beat of the music playing...somewhat.

So here I am, Gonzalo is gone; all by myself in this mosh pit of madness. The music that was playing seemed to possess the miscreants in the vortex. I had my hands up in a defensive manner as I ran in circles. It seemed like these people had murderous intent as they almost hunted to hurt people in the circle. It was crazy...but I couldn't stop running.

Despite all this foolishness, I was surprisingly was having fun. I was a free spirit among a sea of rabid monstrous beings. It was almost like a football field. I was evading would-be tacklers as I dodged and weaved between the menacing, mindless neanderthals. You could say I was having the time of my life. Perhaps it was the drugs, perhaps it was my heightened adrenaline pumping through my body, perhaps the music was mesmerizing me as well, my journey didn't stop until the song did.

The band played a couple more times and I evaded the rush like Mike Vick in his prime. I saw plenty of people go down with injuries, self inflicted or otherwise. I was one of the lucky ones. I eventually found Gonzalo too. He had the same look of joy and awareness in his eyes that I assume I had. We both survived the first wave of pandemonium.

It was only 10:00am.

More bands came and went. We saw the Expendables singer shave his epic beard. We re-upped on Mary Jane by randomly running into an old friend. We saw a man in a white outfit, ruin said digs due to having his own blood covering and likely ruining it in the process.

We participated in some more mosh pits as a group. I forget which band did it, but they opened up the mosh pit to a giant arena setting and made it a mosh obstacle course. I remember someone actively chasing me during this marathon. Someone tried to go low on me and take out my legs. I mentioned it felt like football earlier, right?

The sun set on the event and by the end of the this trip, the lot of us were both exhausted and fulfilled. I was glad I went out of my comfort zone and participated in this spectacle. I doubt I will ever experience something so bizarre and twisted again. It was scary at times, but fighting that fear brought an untold amount of bliss that will hard to replicate.

Controlled chaos indeed.


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